


Taking the Guinea-Pig for a Walk

by Alania_Black



Series: 366 fics for 2016 [17]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Animal AU, Guinea-Pig!Bilbo, M/M, They're all animals, Thorin and Dwalin are giant puppies, srsly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2016-02-01
Packaged: 2018-05-17 12:54:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5870452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alania_Black/pseuds/Alania_Black
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thorin the dog takes Bilbo the Guinea-Pig for a walk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Taking the Guinea-Pig for a Walk

**Author's Note:**

  * For [alkjira](https://archiveofourown.org/users/alkjira/gifts).



> **Story note:**  
>  Where to begin! Umm, I put this under Bilbo/Thorin/Dwalin but they're all animals of the fluffy variety so the romance is more imagined/anthropomorphized by humans. 
> 
> Someone posted a photo on Tumblr of a dog taking a Guinea-Pig for a walk and I was reminded of the fabulous [Menagerie à Trois](http://archiveofourown.org/works/986358/chapters/1944212) by [alkjira](http://archiveofourown.org/users/alkjira/pseuds/alkjira) so I had to write it - this is NOT set in alkjira's series, it is a standalone fic that was prompted by their animal goodness.
> 
>  **Series note:**  
>  I am working on writing a fic every day of 2016, so I don't have time to re-edit each piece on the day (I have other things going on as well), however I have a strategy in place for editing the fics so there will be a polished version available soon. In the meantime, I'd appreciate it if you would not comment with typos and suchlike until I've published the edited version.

Bilbo had been with them for a long time before Dis had felt particularly comfortable letting Dwalin or Thorin near him. She would have been happy to keep them separate forever - but Bilbo looked lonely in his cage all on his own. 

She thought about getting another little Guinea-Pig to go with him, but she was still annoyed that Kili had somehow gotten around her and managed to bring the animal home from school in the first place - before telling her that the teacher had left and the new one didn't want animals in the classroom. She'd grudgingly kept the animal after talking to the teacher (and Mr Saruman had definitely given her the impression that if she'd given him the animal it would have ended up on the bottom of the nearest river) but she wasn't about to reward this sort of behaviour in her son. 

Still, the sight of Bilbo sitting morosely as close to the wires on his cage as possible with a sad little look on his face was enough to make even her a little sad. He'd scurried so happily around in his cage at first, but as the days passed he looked more and more lonely. Nowadays whenever Kili wasn't playing with him (which was getting more often as the "newness" wore off, typically for a six-year-old) Bilbo could be found pressed against the edge of his cage unerringly closest to where her two big dogs had sprawled themselves. 

And the times when the dogs weren't in the room - she couldn't even bear to think about!

No, something had to be done, and since she wasn't about to get another companion for the Guinea-Pig while Kili was still grounded for bringing the thing home in the first place, she would have to make do with what she had. And if that meant two giant Huskies learning not to rip a tiny Guinea-Pig into pieces, well that was just how it would be. 

Dwalin, she had decided, would go first. He was bigger than Thorin, and had half an ear missing from fights before they had rescued him - to the casual observer, he looked like the bigger, meaner and scarier dog. But he was actually a little softy - she'd even caught him giving his kibble to the neighborhood cats! If ever there was a dog that should have been a sweet little lap-dog, it was her Dwalin. She was confident he wouldn't hurt Bilbo. 

Thorin, she was less confident about. One challenge at a time. 

She put the little harness and leash on Bilbo that she had been encouraged to buy - and she definitely found it disturbing that she now had a leash for a Guinea-Pig! - before shutting Thorin out of the room and hooking a leash to Dwalin's collar. Satisfied that she had some control over the dog, she lifted Bilbo out of his cage and took tight hold of his leash. 

Almost instantly, Dwalin began tugging on the leash, straining for the Guinea-Pig - who scurried over to him and promtly sat down on his paws. Dwalin immediately stopped straining and huffed down at the tiny animal. He sniffed Bilbo's fur a few times, nosing gently at him - then opened his mouth and licked a wet stripe up Bilbo's golden fur, squashing down some of his curls. Satisfied, he flopped down and lay his face beside the Guinea-Pig, who began making a noise Dis had been assured was purring. 

"Well," Dis said out loud, "that went well." 

She shouldn't be surprised. Her dogs were always odd.

Eventually she sat down close to them, still watching Dwalin suspiciously - she couldn't be sure that he wouldn't swallow Bilbo in one crunch if she turned her back. Unfortunately, she'd forgotten one important variable: Thorin. 

The dog loved Dwalin, and never went far from the other Husky. He had bitten and growled at other dogs that got near him, and only seemed to tolerate the local cats because Dwalin made him. She should have known that locking him out would only work for so long, and both dogs had long since learned how to open the door - so when he burst in and immediately headed for Dwalin, she shouldn't have been surprised. 

He stopped short when he reached the bigger dog, staring at Bilbo lying shamelessly on _his_ Dwalin. He sniffed Bilbo suspiciously, before with a soft growl he bit the handle of Bilbo's leash and ran from the room. Bilbo let out a small squeak before he was forced to follow. 

Dis and Dwalin both leapt to their feet and ran after Thorin. He didn't go too far, and he actually seemed to be running fairly slowly - slow enough that Bilbo was now trotting happily along with him.

Dis slowed with a soft "huh" sound, and watched as Thorin lead Bilbo through the open door to their garden, and over to his favourite outdoor bed. Thorin sat back and watched, seemingly indulgent, as Bilbo snuffled curiously around their space, before finally curling up into a tiny golden ball in the centre. Dwalin licked Thorin's ear and snout a few times, before curling up behind Bilbo. Thorin immediately took up the space left for him, and licked down a stubborn curl on the top of Bilbo's head.

Well, Dis thought. At least Bilbo didn't look sad anymore.


End file.
